The Five People who broke Katerina Petrova
by Fields of Gold 93
Summary: A five-part insight into the people who made Katherine the way she is now - unable to believe in love, only self-preservation. Set from her childhood onwards.
1. Gospodin Petrova

1. Gospodin Petrova.

Katerina loved her father more than she ever loved anyone for sixteen years. She was his only daughter and he cherished every moment spent with her, to her delight. Though Gospozha, her dear mother had tried numerous times, she could not bear him the son she thought he so dearly desired, and though Katerina celebrated with her mother through every beginnings of pregnancy and cried with her after every miscarriage, a dark part of her rejoiced as she was no longer threatened for her father's undivided love and attention.

She would yearn for the times when he patted his lap, encouraging her to curl up into him and intake a deep breath as he told her epic stories of Slavic folklore and his own experiences with the demons, vampires, _likho_ and _vodnik_. The stories would inevitably end in her whimpering and gripping onto her father closer. _"Papa, no more, please!"_ and he would assure her that she was far too pure to be touched by any of these unclean creatures; that the mere sight of an innocent soul like hers would be enough to vanquish any demon.

They would have heated rows as Katerina progressed though adolescence, often due to her growing vanity and unconventional ideas, much too liberal for the 15th century. Katerina enjoyed attention in every possible sense of the word. She enjoyed her parents' overprotective attention, she enjoyed the leering attention of her fathers plump acquaintances as she caught their eye, the awed attention of their strapping young sons as she would be playfully courteous and innocently desirable. She enjoyed the disapproving looks other girls and their mothers would give to her, for it was jealousy, and jealously was the best form of flattery. So their rows would be passionate and angry, but would only last a day, and never any lashings – Gospodin would never lay a hand on his beautiful daughter, leading others to think she was spoiled. Her family did not have much – they were affluent in the village, but the village was a poor one and her clothes were made only by their seamstress but anything they could give to her, they did. They had a small number of servants, orphan boys and girls which Gospodin 'adopted' into their home as he was a great man – the best man to ever live, according to his daughter – to work for them. She didn't want to think it was because of his inability to father any more children, because Katerina hoped everyday that she was enough. It's true that he had a paternal fondness of his servants, particularly the males, but it was different to one of his own blood and descent.

Gospozha once swore to Katerina they would never let any harm come to her – Gospodin was already searching for the prefect man for his daughter (though none would be perfect enough), and they would court and fall in love and he would provide for her all the things Gospodin could not – to which Katerina would insist to him that he had given her everything she ever wanted.

In late November 1490, with Katerina barely 16 years of age, her dear father ordered her to leave. Leave his house, leave their village. She had disgraced him, and should never return.


	2. Nikolay Georgiev

2. Nikolay Georgiev

Katerina first saw Nikolay when she was seven – he was ten. Gospodin had vaguely known Petar Georgiev until his untimely death in 1481, but they had never been firm friends. Nikolay's life story was a tragic one – his mother had died in childbirth and his father blamed him for it with every look, as he once told Katerina.

As Gospodin took Nikolay in, he gave the boy an extremely modest room in the small quarters he owned, 10 minutes walk from his own house. He would work his days tending to horses – at the age of thirteen he was given responsibility for the entire stables (a glorified 'head 'stable boy) and when he was not working he would tend to Gospodin's wishes – he revered Gospodin as a saint for showing him this kindness. When Gospodin's wishes were fulfilled, Katerina would shyly ask him to play with her – chasing around the village and hiding in the forests (he always knew where she was but humoured her for as long as she could handle) until she triumphantly would come out from behind her thinly disguised shrub or tree and call him a идиот (_idiot_) and he would laugh gently and apologise. This would become one of the highlights of her day.

As Katerina reached the age of twelve, she realised two things she had not before. Firstly, she was falling for Nikolay, and secondly she was by no means the only one. He was a charming fifteen year old, completing the progression from boy to man, and she had heard that not only those girls a couple of years older than her took a liking to him, but girls even around the age of marriage. _Seventeen_ year old girls would watch him as he took the horses for outings and fawn as his back was turned, and Katerina decided that she despised them.

She knew it was wrong to have these sorts of feelings – her mother had warned her against them, told her it was the first step of becoming a succubus or a _samodiva_. But an unfamiliar feeling deep below her stomach would stir every time Nikolay caught her by the shoulders or teasingly pressed his lips to her hand and called her "Princess Katerina". She enjoyed this feeling very much.

He had taught her how to ride a horse at the age of ten and now at thirteen, she was near enough of an expert. With glee, she would see the jealousy on other doe eyed faces as he lifted her atop a horse and patiently coached her from walk to gallop.

She felt the same jealousy when she saw him teach other girls the same things.

On Katerina's fourteenth birthday, she woke up to find a fourteen purple wildflowers on outside windowsill of her room – ones that she had explicitly told him were her favourite. On her fourteenth birthday, she also saw Nikolay locked in an embrace with Maria Kostova. She had gone to the stables to thank him, but when she checked inside and saw no one, she decided to circle the backs.

Maria's _ugly, poorly sewn_ dress, Katerina thought, was hitched above her waist as Nikolay's hand had disappeared under the fabric, and Katerina could not break her gaze from the torturous scene, the heated kisses.

She went home that night, didn't eat any of the sweet breads her mother had made, and cried herself to sleep, unable to dispel the memory etched into her mind.

She stopped visiting the stables, and when he came to her, she would fabricate unconvincing stories as to why she couldn't come and ride. He finally asked her about two months after the incident, whether he had doe something wrong. When she pertly answered no and called him an idiot again, more venomously than she had ever spoken before, his eyes looked sad. He thought it was because he hadn't visited on her birthday – but he told her he had left wildflowers and hoped she would come to the stables. When she said with a trembling lip that she did, and asked if he and Maria were to wed, his skin paled and he left without another word.

The next time Katerina talked to Nikolay was a full year later, when she had almost forgotten about him - a time she will never forget until true death. She was sat in the fringes of the forest, next to her favourite wildflowers as always, trying her hand at embroidery her mother had given her. He came unexpectedly, and when she asked him to leave he did not comply. Instead, he cupped her chin with his coarse and lifted her head to look at him. "_Katerina, you cannot feel this way about me_." She tried to turn her head away, but his grip was too strong. She tried to spit out malicious words but none were true – Nikolay was clever, strong, kind and perfect. So she said nothing, just willing her tears not to fall, as that would look so weak. "_Katerina, you are too beautiful to want me. I cannot give you the future you deserve_." With this she found her voice, "_I can't help it. It's your fault for making me love you_."

Silence. No spoken answer would suffice, so she closed her eyes and let a tear fall. At the same moment, she felt his lips brush hers and her eyes flew open.

She opened her mouth invitingly; she had practised this many times in her dreams but reality was different. She hadn't known Nikolay's tongue was going to flick at her own, and her hand automatically wrapped themselves around his neck, feeling his hand sweeping through her cascading hair, drawing soft little patterns on her scalp which made her emit an embarrassing sound. When he drew back from the deep kiss she whimpered and clutched at his neck, not wanting him to leave. His eyes searched hers and slowly bent her back until she was lying amidst the wildflowers, and he kissed her again, with more urgency and force than before. She felt her hips involuntarily lift upwards to meet his own, between there clothes, and Nikolay faltered. He whispered her name questioningly, her breath hot in his ear that sends shivers down her spine even today. "_Katerina?_" They were now in harmony with the forest – breathless and secretive, dangerous and visceral. Before she knew it, Katerina was lying, as naked as the day she was born, for the first time in front of anyone else, as Nikolay whispering kisses through the length of her body, and suddenly they were more together than ever before. Katerina bit her lip to keep from crying out, her eyes pooling with tears but he kissed them away. She thought they would be together forever.

When her period did not come that month, or the month after, Katerina was over the moon. Periods were messy, pointless and painful, and she told her mother this in glee. This was why she was confused when mother cried.

Her father did not cry. He did not look at her. Instead, he took his belt and a dagger to Nikolay's quarters and lashed him until his back was a web of crimson welts. He took the dagger to his throat and ordered him to leave.

Katerina was cast out six months later, after a premature childbirth, not even the opportunity to hold her precious daughter. And try as she might, wish upon wish to find Nikolay, he did not want to be found.


End file.
